Wednesday 11 March 2015

Baby clothes: to Goth or not to Goth?

I'm thinking this may or may not be a controversial post, but I've been considering this topic for such a long time (since I was pregnant with Reegan and first started buying baby clothes) and finally feel like I have enough parenting experience (?!) to comment.  Whatever you do or say when it comes to parenting there are always people who agree or disagree, respectfully or not. It's a minefield.

I remember picking out a cute black party dress from a baby clothes shop when my mum was pregnant with my sister (only five years ago) and my gran flapping and saying "you CAN'T put babies in BLACK!" But then I think for her generation it's more superstition than anything else. Surprisingly though it was my gran defending me from comments made by a friend of hers when I took Reegan out for lunch with them dressed in her spiderweb baby grow.  She just turned it into a joke, saying 'can't you see the child is a goth in training?'  Haha.

Reegan at at about 2 months old


The first garment I bought for my daughter was actually brown, because we didn't discover Reegan's gender until she was born. So all of her first clothes were gender neutral, (including the gothier items) and whilst I do put her in girly clothes sometimes I still have absolutely no issue with dressing her in 'boy' clothes if I think they are cute or more practical. A lot of people I know will be surprised to see my daughter in pink dresses or frills, they make superficial judgments based on my appearance and assume that I will impose my tastes upon my child. But then, doesn't everybody? All parents dress their kids in clothes they deem aesthetically pleasing, nobody would choose to 'subject' their kids to wearing clothing they consider ugly, it's just that cute or ugly are subjective to opinion.

Sure, my daughter has her fair share of dresses. She has a decent amount of androgynous playsuits and garments,  as well as clothing from labels like Spiral Direct, slogan vests, and band 'shirts'. The latter are based upon our musical tastes as parents, therefore the ones Reegan's dad and I think of as the cutest because (lets face it) most parents like to think of their children as small cute versions of themselves.  We love the idea that they would share our passions and interests, and hope that one day they will turn out just like us, only better. The same goes for the aesthetically gothic items, many of which were gifts but I am not ashamed to admit that my own tastes greatly influence Reegan's wardrobe.

An outfit a friend also has for her son
A rare moment I got her to keep a headband on for more than three seconds...


For the most part though anything goes. Whilst I do most of the clothes shopping for her if people buy clothes for her as gifts then I will most definitely put her in them, not only out of politeness but hey,  waste not want not. More than anything the things that I want out of baby clothes are practicality.  Easy to put on, take off, wash and wear. I want my baby to feel comfortable and have some freedom of movement (I have always said I can't stand seeing babies in denim, I just think it's cruel and will refuse to put Reegan in this fabric or any similar until she is older) and look at least presentable. Another admission, yes mothers do see their children as a reflection of themselves and having a presentable child makes you feel at least adequate as a parent.  So wrong, I know.  You can't help feeling the way you do. If I can get my hands on baby clothes that I really like  then even better,  but rest assured that as soon as my daughter is able to pick her own clothing then she will be doing so.  And I actually can't wait for that part.

8 comments:

  1. People's assumptions about other people's children are ridiculous. Apparently when I was a baby a woman refused to believe I was a baby girl because I was wearing a hand me down blue babysuit. I (as someone who doesn't actually have kids) feel that it is ok to dress your child as you like until they are old enough that they start expressing their own opinions, that you have to then respect.

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    1. I totally agree. People say things like, how could you put her in "xyz" she will be so embarrassed when she is older!

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  2. In the beginning, I put my son in whatever fit and most of it were gifts from other people. I do buy items I like but now that he is old enough to choose, I let him choose, obviously your daughter is still too young to do so!. Do what you think is right, what makes you and your child happy. Screw everyone else! Your little one is adorable, by the way. I think you have a good mindset and make a cool mom!

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    1. Exactly. In the beginning you are just trying to figure out what you arr doing and gettinfnto grips with the basics of motherhood, most days I didn't even get dressed let alone dress Reegan nicely! But thankyou, and most definitely screw everyone else! I do often find myself looking to your blog when I feel alone as an alternative parent!

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  3. Well, I'm not a mom but thought about a lot of these topics (even more since most of my friends already do have a family...) Every person adds her/his own taste into their babies clothes so I think I would, too (until they can decide). Along my friends some refuse to put their babies in black (and then be uber happy when old enough the girl/boy wants some black clothes) and some have only goth clothes for their kids, and some others have mixed things. I'm fine with all of these. Sorry but when i was a kid i got boys clothes, too. Then a few things my mom made for me on her sewing machine and then some stuff from the store...

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    1. It's good to have a mix. I have friends that are mums but no one else in my friendship group has kids yet, so I suppose I will be showing the way. As long as the kids are happy I don't suppose it matters :)

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  4. Interesting post. I agree with you about comfort and denim baby clothes. My mom agrees too... She wouldn't buy me my first jeans until I was like 12

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    1. Yeah kids need the freedom to just be kids! Let them play without restriction :)

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